Commentary on the Gospel of John

                                  Chapter Four

                                                                                                                                       Verses 16-18

At this point, Jesus knew that this woman had become fully ready to receive the gift of the Holy Spirit. But she first had to realize that she had sinned and that she was ready to give up her sins. So Jesus told her to go and bring her husband to Him. Apparently, Jesus knew that her husband also had a spiritual nature. Since Jesus told her to call her husband, then He must have considered the man she was with to be truly her husband. God had put this man and woman together to be husband and wife in His sight. God permits no other type of true marriage. This woman was married to five other men in the eyes of her community, but they were not true marriages in God's eyes. Humans have many religious and civil marriage ceremonies that are not marriages to God.

From the beginning, God put a man and a woman together in marriage without any marriage ceremony. Genesis 2:23-25. The Old Testament has a decided lack of marriage ceremonies. The New Testament records only one marriage ceremony. However, there are good and bad aspects of marriage ceremonies. One of the good aspects of marriage ceremonies happens to be that they assure everyone in the church or in the community in the case of civil marriage that the man and woman are truly married in human eyes. These types of marriages are almost always between a man and a woman who have fallen in love, and therefore, can only be sins of weakness. Throughout His Word, God demonstrates that He has great compassion for sins of weakness. This could be one reason why God allowed Moses to write divorce into His Word. Matthew 19:3-9. The bad aspects happen to be that the ceremonies, especially the beautiful ones, put the ideas in the man and woman's heads that their beautiful romance will cause them to have a blissful marriage, when in fact, their marriage may be one of trials and heartaches. In addition, since the bride happens to be the star of beautiful ceremonies, this event sometimes puts the idea in her head that she will be the star of the marriage, when in fact, she and her husband should be equals in their marriage.

Believers saved by grace should never marry anyone except another true believer. They should abstain from making love until they both know that God has made them man and wife. They should fervently pray for at least several months for God to tell them that they should become man and wife. God tells a person who has become saved by grace that He has saved them, and He tells a person when He has called that person to preach, so God will tell a man and woman that He has married them. When a man and a woman assure themselves, after a lot of prayer, that God has put them together in marriage, then they should simply announce to their church in a particular worship service that God has put them together to live as man and wife. They should not go on dates before marriage because that invites temptation. They should simply talk together after worship services, and when they begin to fall in love, they should agree to fervently pray about whether or not God wants them to marry. If God says no, then they should accept His will even though they are falling in love. Although they should love each other, they should not attach a lot of romance to their marriage because God, for His own reasons, may give them a marriage of trials and heartaches